it's March 23th. And life is still going on this way. Big and empty house. Dvd's for 24 hours nonstop. Sleep lately, rise lately. Take away food. Seeing bestfriend a couple times a week. Doing last assignment. Job resigning off. I guess my mom is right. I used to confused, because I'm lost I don't know what to do and where to go. That symptom, is happening again.
Once is enough.
I'm grateful, tho. For the house I live in. For family I had, they're not the best but they're all I had. For a good friends. For enough food to keep me alive. For a good health to keep me walk on my feet. For a good shot of chance to let me go to college. That is more than enough to be called as a good life.
I don't know how could I be such a stubborn asshole. Such an infidel. Rejecting Him. Distrust Him too much. Doubting too much. While all I have to do is being grateful for my recent life. My bad life is over. It's over since several years ago. My bad life stops when my Mom stop hitting me on my face, it stops when she stopped making a bruise on my body, it stops when we finally didn't need to sell something to eat, it stops when I move back here. My bad life stops a long time ago.
What I had now is not a bad life. It's a bad situation. Bad time. Bad self. I'm my worst enemy for my self. Good night
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